Manifrustration?

You've watched the Secret.

You've read Seth.

You've listened to Abraham.

You've been hypnotized, released, reiki'd, channelled, seminared, quantumed, NLPd and ascended to the point of exhaustion.

You've got affirmations taped to everything and if you are stuck in line for five minutes, you close your eyes and picture your perfect life. You're festooned with magic jewelry, your desk has more crystals and geodes than the geology departments of some small universities and your bookshelves look like the shipping facility at Hay House. You could shingle your roof with the amount of CDs and DVDs you've bought on the subject (and you might as well!)

And you've had successes - you've manifested parking spots, pennies on the ground and blue feathers galore.

And yet - the big stuff, the big changes - they never seem to happen. You see a lot of driftwood, a lot of cars in the next door neighbor's driveway, but it never seems to come to you.

Here are two possibilities:

1. You haven't yet found the right tools to make the changes you want to make, or


2. You don't really want to change.

If it's 2 - that's great! Maybe your life doesn't suck as much as you assume it does. Maybe there would be a real downside for you if you suddenly had Paris Hilton's money or Bill Gates' business empire. Maybe there's something to be said for your own un-mega non-spectacular home, family, car and job that's delicate, precious and worth more to you than the things that society and the mass media have convinced you that you ought to want instead.

Maybe you're afraid that, given the monkey's paw, your wishes would all have horrible consequences that you can't possibly forsee, but you just know they're lurking over the horizon. After all, it's in all the stories. No wish is ever fulfilled without a Terrible Price.

The genie bottle is always Pandora's box, isn't it? At least in the fictional world. Thank goodness that 1 is also true- you don't have that magic wishing dust! Phew! Crisis averted! Yeah, you almost ruined your life, but no worries, there's no way you could make your wishes come true anyway.

And as long as that's true, you'll always be protected from the possibility of making a Bad Wish and changing everything. And we all know that change always leads to disaster.

So... great! Don't read any further. Go back to wishing for something that can make your wishes come true, and if there's any possibility that that could actually happen, make sure to completely forget about it as soon as you figure it out. It's too much power for any one human being to have.

Do not take a look at this deceptively named little system! (and if you do go read about it, for heavens' sake, don't take me up on the offer to get $20 off if you pay by credit card or this other link that gives you $20 off if you pay by PayPal. After all, there's a money-back guarantee, so you might be tempted to try the system, you know, to show good faith before you go get your money back, and it might work for you, and then where would you be?)

Don't take the chance that you might have actually found a system that works, because then you might change something! And who are you to change your life? Hmmm? How can you possibly know what you want, and even if you do, how can you trust yourself to know that it's something you should want?

Better go back to wishing for more wishes, rather than actually using a wish...

Wishin', and Hopin', and Thinkin', and Prayin'

Sorry if I've earwormed you! But believe it or not, this cute and somewhat silly song has an important message about what works and what doesn't that applies to manifestation and cosmic ordering.

Though the song is about romance, the principle applies in a wider sense as well.

And it is this: wishing, hoping, thinking, praying, planning and dreaming do not work. If you only do these things, you will not get that thing you are wishing, hoping, thinking, praying, planning and dreaming of.

The song goes on to recommend holding, kissing, squeezing, and loving. For many of your manifesting projects, these actions may not be the, um, most appropriate.

But the idea is the same. You have to stop wishing, hoping, thinking, praying, planning and dreaming, and "just do it!"

Wait a minute - am I now telling you to go slog through some torturous, suffer-making action?

Well, not really - at least, not the sort of unhelpful action you are used to business gurus telling you to go do. I don't mean you have to ton on the cold calls or do tedious detailed goal-setting or any of the myriad of Actions That Don't Work. I also don't advise you to literally follow all the advice in the song exactly. For instance, "You gotta show him that you care just for him / Do the things that he likes to do / Wear your hair just for him" - oh please!

Metaphorically, though, it works. The advice is to become the person that the "him" in the song will want. In the more expanded view of your whole life, though, you need to become the person who has the life you intend.

Note I don't say "the life you want", "the life you wish for", or "your dream life."

For instance, say you want a glass of water. If you just want it, you will never get it. But you don't just wish for a glass of water, you go get it. You don't pray you will get up and get it, you just go do it.

It's a simplistic example, but the steps are essentially the same. When you want a glass of water, first you decide you will get it. You set your intent. You go to where drinking glasses are and you get one. You take it to where the water is and you get the water. You drink the water.

Without the decision, you will just sit there. Without the intent, you may wander into the kitchen, forget the water and eat a cookie instead. Without the appropriate action, you will never actually drink the water. But once you've made the decision and set your intent, the appropriate action becomes obvious, or at least fairly clear.

Even if you ask someone else to get it, you still have to decide to ask that person, and then actually do the asking.

You may be alone in a friend's house - still, you can make a good guess as to where there are glasses and where you can get water.

You might be outside in a strange town. Still, with a little research, you can find a place to get water; a street vendor, a store, maybe a park with a drinking fountain. You might have to ask someone for help or directions, but if you're intent on getting that water you will find a way.

But if you just stand there on the street corner wishing, will you get it? Not likely.

Changing your life, of course, is a bigger and more complicated task, but the principle is the same. You have to decide what that next phase of your life will be, then start living it. Once you decide, really decide, and really intend that new life path, the next actions will be a lot more obvious.

Wishing, hoping, thinking, and praying won't get you there. Deciding, intending, commanding and being... will.

What is Cosmic Ordering and why is it better?

Why Cosmic Ordering?

Because "The Secret" takes itself too damn seriously!

Really.

Sure, there's a Law of Attraction. You will attract into your life what you are.

But if you want to use it, you need to change yourself into that person-who-has-what-you-want. If you think about it that way, it can seem almost impossible.

You have to move up the vibrational scale, think yourself into the desired state - whatever way they put it, it looks easy but feels... hard. A lot of the currently popular manifestation techniques are OK in some circumstances - other times, they can be a real slog. Endlessly writing, visualizing, and affirming can be a chore!

Cosmic Ordering is just more fun. Because it's fun, it's easy. And it's quick!

Think about it - you get a catalog in the mail. You flip through it and see a sweater you like. Now - you don't agonize about "being the person who has the sweater." You just order it. And sooner or later it shows up. There you are - you are the person who has the sweater.

The point is, you don't even think about it. You want it to happen, it happens.

Now, for Cosmic Ordering. It's exactly the same thing, except you are ordering the Future You Who Has... anything! Not just a sweater.

Say you want a new job. It's got to be one you can reasonably do. If you're not already a CEO of a giant corporation, or at least a high up executive, likely you can't see yourself as CEO of, say, IBM or something. This doesn't mean you couldn't manifest it (or manifest your garage company to grow bigger than IBM) - it's just not likely to happen as a first step.

In the same way, you're not going to get out the precious-gem-beaded ballgown catalog when you want a replacement for that moth-eaten green sweater with the hole n the elbow; you're going to grab the sweater catalog.

It's probably not much of a stretch to see yourself with a job like one you have (or have had) just with more pay and better working conditions.

Here is where you might plunge into writing out your ideal scene, crafting a visualization script or coming up with a dozen properly-worded affirmations. Blah. Too much work!

Instead, flip through that cosmic catalog and find that nice new sweater of a job - the one that's warmer, better looking and fits better.Then order it. Then forget it!

No daily meditations or writing out affirmations like Bart Simpson at the chalkboard. Just think about it, decide you want it and then let it go.

Do I mean, never think about it again? Not really.

Sometimes when you (physically) order a (physical) thing from a catalog, you think about it occasionally, but never with anxiety. Maybe "I'm going to that new restaurant Saturday, I hope the sweater gets here in time so I can wear it." That kind of thought is fine.

Basically, though, when you've made your Cosmic Order, you really do just wait for it to show up.

Isn't that easier?

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New Age Guano

Because there's a lot of it floating around out there. I'm not saying the people pushing it aren't (mostly) well-meaning. But no matter how well-meaning a person is, if they're feeding you poo pie, it doesn't do you a lot of good to eat it. Just say "no thanks."

First, vibrations. While it may be true that essentially, all matter is vibration, it's a pretty big leap to say that your emotions are also vibration and therefore, can directly affect matter. It's a pretty idea (pretty silly) that you can vibrate a red Mercedes or a villa in Spain, and people rarely do when they approach it that way.

So, does that mean choosing to feel happy won't make your life better? I'm not saying that. It definitely will. After all, what are you trying to do with all this manifesting in the first place? I'm assuming you want to manifest stuff and experiences that will make you happy. Paradoxically, feeling happy first is the quickest way to make those manifestations happen. But it doesn't have anything to do with vibrations, in the technical physics sense.

If the idea of vibrations is a helpful metaphor for you - if it gets you in the mood of being "a person who has (x)" - then, cool. Use it. But be aware it's a metaphor. Don't think you're using science.

Because manifesting isn't a science, at least not yet. It's an art, and a subjective one (which is what makes it so tricky to explain.)

Second - speaking of science - manifesting also has nothing to do with quantum physics.

I know that many, if not most, of the current crop of manifesting gurus will start out with a quick intro to some of the weirder implications of quantum physics (and it's cool stuff.) But except for Fred Alan Wolf, these folks are not physicists (and neither am I.)

This might be useful as a brain stretcher, but it's not really teaching you quantum physics. Most of the weirdest quantum effects are only operative at the micro level, not at the macro level - in other words, these are things that can be experimentally verified under tightly controlled conditions at the level of infinitesimally-tiny-stuff, but nothing you'll be able to experience or use in a practical way in the Real World.

The best helpful metaphor you can get out of this is the concept of multiple universes, but you don't even need that to successfully manifest your life on purpose.

Third - let's dispense with New Age Fascism. This includes the concept of tithing, the idea that you can't use your manifesting powers for personal gain, and the idea that it's better to be Of Service To Others rather than to do or create what you want.

You can manifest anything and any life you want, as long as it is "you." Manifesting is all about stretching your identity to encompass the you that has whatever it is you want. That's it. If you really want to be a super successful serial killer, there is nothing stopping you from manifesting that outcome. I wouldn't recommend it - there are way more fun uses of manifesting - but there's no law stopping you (besides the usual human ones.)

As for Being Of Service, you'll notice that people who tell you you have to do this usually have a pretty good idea of what you should do with your life, and use persuasion and guilt to get you to do what they think is right.

But imagine if well-meaning folks had persuaded Mozart, or Georgia O'Keefe, or Michael Jordan, that their lives would be better spent changing bedpans for lepers (or some other self-sacrificing bull.) Would we have a richer or poorer world, on balance?

If you're really drawn to change bedpans for lepers, of course, go do it. But do it because it's what you're drawn to do in the world, not because someone else guilts you into it.

(And if you are objecting that my example people are all extraordinary - you're not? Who says?)

Now, for tithing - the most insidious of all the New Age rackets. Tithing "works" because it allows you to become a generous person (OK, it forces you to) and that might kickstart you into an identity of abundance. But it might not - you might just resent it, and that won't help at all.

The insidious part is what usually goes along with the instructions to tithe. First of all, you're given many examples of people who tithed and then suddenly became magically way better off.

Then, like those old chain letters, you get hit with the fear factor - stories of people who stopped tithing, or forgot to tithe, or just decided they didn't need to do it anymore. And then Bad Things Happened To Them. It's usually a long scary litany that starts with bankruptcy and illness and only goes downhill from there.

So what do New Age gurus get out of scaring the pants (and wallets) off their students?

Well, it could be just ordinary sadism. It's usually a little more self serving, though, since eventually the instructions will hem and haw their way to a discussion of who, exactly, you should tithe to.

They will say, sure, tithe to your church, or your favorite charity, if you must, but *ahem* the people who get the most success out of tithing are the ones who tithe to those spiritual teachers who have taught them the most. Like, how to tithe.

Hmmmm.

OK, remember what I said about personal gain being OK and all? I'm making an exception for this sort of spiritual blackmail. Please do not use your powers of manifestation to scare money out of other people. It just plain isn't nice.

So if you're not vibrating, tithing, Service-ing, or non-local-Schroedinger's Catting your way to manifestation, how do you do it?

It's simple, but it's not necessarily easy. You have to become the person who has what you want. In other words, you "only" have to change your identity. You have to stop being who you are, and become who you want to be.

If all you needed was a word to the wise, then, there, that was it. You're all set.

If you're more like me, though, there's more to the journey. And that's what this site is all about.

A sake genie bottle that turns out to be the real thing

I have a friend who's been playing the lottery for years, with amazing results that defy chance - sometimes weeks at a time of absolutely zero numbers right (on two or three tckets per drawing.)

This gets my interest, because this friend has occasional financial challenges and frequently says things like "If only I could hit one - it doesn't even have to be the big prize..." and (when someone wins) "They stole it from us!" (Yeah, my husband and I go in on the tickets - it makes a nice reality creation laboratory.)

I wanted to see if I could overcome this heavy energy, so I used the basic Cosmic Ordering methodology (which includes not giving a rip!) and won $75. But that was on my ticket - I wanted to see if I could alter that for my friend too, but no such (*ahem*) luck...

The Law of Attraction and "The Secret" gurus will tell you that "all" you have to do in a case like this is change your energy, align your vibration, drag yourself up the emotional ladder, concentrate on the good feeling... All that is nice, but in the case of the so-called impossible goal, it rarely helps.

In fact, in a highly unscientific anecdotal trawl through a few forums, I found several people claiming to have won millions of dollars; following up, I found that all - every one - were wishful thinking posts intended to create that result. None had actually had a real-world win.

In only one case did someone actually win a large sum (I think it was one or two hundred thousand, though, not millions) using the standard Law of Attraction techniques, and it took weeks of dedicated imaginal work. And that was someone who had a lot of experience with smaller creations first.

I think that the amount of thinking about a goal like winning money - one that seems very much out of your own control - can be counterproductive. Unless you're completely blindly ignorant of statistics, you will always always always be aware of how much of a long shot winning money is.

Anyway. Back to the sake genie bottle.

So last week we - me, my husband, our friend - were having sushi at this incredible little restaurant.

After some terrific sushi and wonderful green tea cake, I took a look at the beautiful little iron-blue bottle our sake came in. The label actually turned out to be a wrapper that said "Aladdin bottle." The chef (we were at the sushi bar) said "you can take that - it makes a nice flower vase." She rinsed it out and handed it to us.

I gave it to my friend, saying "maybe you can use it to win some money" - sort of making a joke of it. And (this is important) he took it with that same attitude, sort of hey, what the heck, it will be fun. And it sure is a pretty bottle, anyway.

Two days later he called me and said "the bottle" had won him $100 on a scratcher.

The next day, he called and said it won him another $250 on a 50-cent numbers ticket.

This is interesting. I'm curious to see if the sake bottle energy will be enough to counteract the heavy energy around playing the "real" lottery (if it does, I'll let you know.) Even if it doesn't, I'd say that the experiment was a great success.